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If you get the chanel BBC America, so yourself a favor and watch Top Gear. New episodes are on Monday nights at 8pm.
This show is about cars. I know it sounds boring, but the three hosts (ages 35-55) are not just hilarious but the producers give them ridiculous challenges each week. So in addition to reviewing and racing some of the most expensive cars on Earth, they do stupid challenges like make their own electric car out of spare parts for other machines.
I am watching an older episode now where there is a 5 part challenge. They don’t know what the challenges ahead of them are.
Step 1: Pretend they’re 17 year old boys and buy & insure a car with only 2500 pounds. Once they have it, meet at the schoolyard.
Step 2. Using whatever money they have leftover, customize the car to impress 17 year old girls. Jeremy didn’t have any money leftover. James bought a nice stereo and Richard got a body kit. Drive to festival grounds 60 km away. (on the way, when James stops to “wee” Richard & Jeremy change out his Bach cd for some loud, obnoxious crap music and super glue all the buttons on his new stereo then steal the remote)
Step 3. The challenge involves what would have been a crazy music fest weekend of camping & mud. They simply pack all the tents & supplies in their respective cars and get out to the top of the car park- an easy race. But, the festival grounds are wet and the cars slip and slide up the hill for hours.
Step 4. Arrive home 3 hours after your curfew and don’t wake your parents up! Richard is successful pushing his S-coupe, Jeremy’s Volvo is so heavy he accidentally pushes it into the shed and James’ VW si so quiet he drives it into the driveway then jsut as he is about to win, Jeremy uses the remote to turn his radio back on full blast.
Step 5. Race around the track, hitting every obstacle in your path, impress 17 year old girls with your hand-brake turn, whoever does it the fastest wins the race.
I won’t tell you who wins because it is such a shock… jsut watch the show already. In addition to learning a little about cars and laughing your ass off, you’ll learn hilarious Brit phrases like, ” It is much like a Scottish Restaurant menu. Not a lot in it and nothing you want.” Do you know what quid is? Or that a boot is part of a car, not you wear on your foot?
Note to Krisann: I am making you watch this episode when you get home tonight. You WILL love this show. -your tumor.
I found it online & HAD to have it! I just put it on tonight so Peter won’t see it until he gets home Friday. I think he’ll love since I love it.
I love him so much. I think we’re so lucky to have found one another. I am still regularly surprised at how much I love him. We went to see Quantum of Solace last night before he had to go back to the ship. I just kept thinking how Peter could be the new James Bond- I was watching the movie & just saw Peter’s face there instead of Daniel Craig. He could be beating the crap out of villains & coming up with plans to get out of an exploding building while protecting me from any injury. He’s smart enough to be Bond & definately handsome & strong enough. I am going to encourage him to audition for the next Bond movie.
Some idiot totalled Krisann’s beloved vehicle, leaving her sans transportation. She needed something to drive so I volunteered the Neon. That’s why I got my new Jeepy. Anyway, she came down to visit this past weekend.
She flew in, the flight was late of course- get used to it!- but I picked her up in my new jeep which she loved. We decided to eat at Kelly’s (at Pembroke- the best one of all) and had a few drinks as well. We went home & Pupp-O flipped his lid when he saw her. He couldn’t keep his feet on the ground. Our little Icarus!
She had a present for Atticus…a belated halloween costume!
I gave her the Kindle, which she decided against in favor of the G1 phone. Then we were worn out & went to sleep. The following day we decided to shop for christms presents while new tires & stereo were installed in the Neon. We shopped forever at the Williamsburg Outlets. After an entie day of shopping we walked away with one lonely Christmas present & a trunk full of bags for ourselves. But- we did decide on the remainder of the presents we need to get.
I was tuning the radio this evening & heard that one of our local stations has already switched to Christmas programming. Now, this is TOO early for Christmas.
Then we came home & made vegetarian tacos & burritos. They were tasty, better in leftovers. Krisann passed out on the couch with the pupster…
Aren’t they arorable together??
They had their moment together the next afternoon saying their goodbyes…
Just bought tonight!!!
I spent a weekend in Richmond visiting Alex. Atticus went along to play with her cat, Samson. I can’t seem to catch them in the same picture though. She was dogsitting so I got to meet the dogs. They were Copper & Blue. Adorable beagles with loads of energy.
Copper was young & getting tired towards the end of the night. He was like a little baby in my arms.
Then Peter got home & worked on my car a bit. He had a chance to combine his two passions, beer and power tools. He ended up making his own tool to work on the car properly.
Then he painted the office and installed a nice light…
while I supervised.
I will update with pictures of the office as it is all complete now. He went back out to sea & I got to visit PA for Dad’s birthday (see next post). When Peter returned again, he completed the guest room upstairs. That is beautiful as well.
My new career at Nationwide ROCKS. The loss of my company car is the only item that stings (& only slightly.) Certainly I will bristle while I spend the summer paying upwards of $3.50 a gallon at the pump when I have not paid a cent for gas in the last several years. It’s been sweet, I’m not going to lie, but my stress level is so much lower now, not to mention the fact that I leave the office everyday & go to a home where there is no longer a remnant of any customer, contractor or sewage damage claim. No car sitting there full of equipment to schlep around, no company cell phone ringing with new claims and after hours messages. No a**hole customer bitching at me about why I don’t work on a holiday like New Year’s Day (I’M HUNG-OVER B*TCH SO LET ME GET BACK TO PASSING OUT!)
Wow! Sorry. Anyway… My neon has consistently failed the last two attempts at a VA state inspection. I have ordered some new headlights from E-Bay (Shipps Corner Citgo can do it for $300 including labor but I can get a pair of new ones on E-Bay for $46 & my sweetie Petey can put them in for a kiss!) which should yield a Pass, Finally!
I feel like I have let that little car down over the last several years. Mom gave it to me & I enjoyed it thoroughly until a newer position at Natiowide presented me the alluring (but ultimately entrapping) world of company cars. Who would spend money on gas for their personal car when the company pays for your personal gas in the company car?? Uh yeah. Doesn’t take a genius. So little Neon spent her time twiddling her CV boots while I ran around the eastern seaboard in a Windstar minivan. Then, I took my last field position & upgraded to a Freestyle (slightly sportier, more personalized) which I really enjoyed. Meanwhile, Neon continued to sit around collecting pine straw. How many times did I let her maintenance slide because I was off cheating on her with a Ford?
No wonder she has been failing, it’s all my fault. I didn’t keep her routine maintenance up-to-date & I let her sit there while her gas has probably transformed into some sort of gel.
She meanwhile, has been nothing but patient. Her slightly fuzzy fabric seats are still sparkly & uncrushed- just waiting to cushion my adulterating ass. Her dash is uncracked & lacking in dust bunnies, ready to reflect the bright beach sun into my sunglass protected eyeballs. How could I??
Sweet Jesus Neon! Can you ever forgive me?? I’m sorry!!!
So I have been thinking for the last few months (until my sudden & unexpected change of heart earlier this morning) that I would be better off with a new or newer car than the neon. I have been scouring the cars.com, E-Bay & Autotrader websites. I spent all day yesterday researching new vehicles online. I joined Consumer Reports a month back so I read their opinions on new & used vehicles. I researched safety online at IIHS (Insurance Institute of Highway Safety for those of you not in the biz) and NHTSA (National Highway Traffic & Safety A…uh, something.) I averaged insurance costs. I have always been a fan of Car Talk & listen to that whenever I hear it (I have yet to remember the time they are on my local NPR station so I can tune in regularly) but I have managed to get a good idea of their general opinions over the last few years.
I narrowed down my choices & built my own vehicle online at each & every automaker’s website to get an idea of prices & options. I made up a spreadsheet & painstakingly color-coded it. (Attaching below for Your reading enjoyment.)
As soon as I got home from work, I forced Tired-Peter into the shower & when he came out he was Slightly-Less-Tired-Peter (a trick I figured out one sluggish weekend) & we looked at cars in person for a change. Mitsubishi was closed when we got there at 6 pm. We stopped at Smart & their cars are on order for ten to twelve months. We couldn’t remember where Toyota was so we tried Honda. I test drove the Fit, which I liked. It was nice, but horribly cheap- only expensive! Roomier than a Smart with a nice sized rear & loads of versatility (fold flat seats, stand up seats & long mode, it was never-ending.) It had lots of headroom for Peter. The thing that really irked me was the crapet (that was initially a typo but I feel it is very appropriate so I’m leaving it.) Instead of having regular car-carpet, Honda lined the bottom with thick heather-gray felt. Felt that seemed oddly familiar. I remember! It used to be used to line the trunks of older cars!
It looked like something Krisann & I could have constructed over a two day weekend all by ourselves. The dash was buttoned to the felt, the seats were so “cheap fabric” I half expected the foam to disintegrate & mush right out through it, like this round orange chair from the 50′s my Grammy pawned off on my little sister. The front was pretty quiet but Peter informed me later that is was very loud in the back.
Krisann’s response was, “Awww…so you wouldn’t pay $15 g’s for a car made of felt & buttons? That’s too bad. I would. Buy the Yaris!” She then forwarded me the following car from Craigslist.
I think the dune buggy is pretty cool but I am looking for something I can drive home for Christmas without having to wear an umbrella hat. If you’re interested, search Pittsburgh Craigslist for Street Legal Dune Buggy posted on 05/07/2008.
I guess I will try out the Yaris, although it has a definite advantage due to my low expectations now. If only I can figure out where they hide that place…
Any car suggestions? Please email them!
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